i think i left my heart behind

I never thought I would like NYC so much. Besides the amazing shopping (Woodbury! Macy's! F21!), the city has so much life, so much diversity, so much friendliness, so much love. The houses near Central Park are absolutely gorgeous, I could stare at them whole day long and imagine the life of the ppl living and breathing in there. Moma, the Met, Empire State Building, Museum of Natural History, Statue of Liberty, damn even Walgreen fascinates me. 

i feel overwhelmed; my senses are overloaded. Everything is huge, every product has gazillion varieties, the flashy neon lights at Times Square, the crazy delicious falafels at tucked in a small alley at Greenwich, the gorgeous handcrafts at Brooklyn flea; im ranting but I can't help it. 

I like you NYC, i like you very much. It was a heavy heart for the pain-in-e-ass(literally) flight home.  I swear I will be back and I know you will not disappoint me.

Turkey. what?!

Was about to embark on an intensive editing of my Tokyo photos when i realised that the turkey photos from last year was not completed yet. So there are still some random bits and parts of Turkey which I have left out.  Was probably too excited in editing the hot air balloon series and the boat trip in Dalyan series and then i kind of lost steam along the way.  Now that i look back at my hot air balloon series, i kind of cringe a little because the editing was so last-year me. That is pretty normal right? Everytime we complete something we are so damn proud of and then fast forward one year and we look back; we go "omg what was i thinking".  Yeah i guess my style in editing and taking pictures have shifted slightly. Imposing higher standards on myself and forcing myself to rethink about photography and drawing inspiration from really really really awesome photographers out there which i know i can never produce photos equal to theirs.

and can u believe it is June already? 6 months just went past like that. So much for wanting to live 2012 with a bang. Work just got more hectic as one progresses from the preparer to the reviewer; working late and burning Saturdays. But i always make a point to never let myself get sucked in too deep, that's when burn out occurs and by then it is already too late to remedy anything.

i guess travelling and doing volunteer work is 2 things that i can tick off against the list of "things in 2012 i did which is pretty awsome". No more being a procrastinating slob xh, no more!

tokyo randoms

some pictures taken of the bff. crazy mad love with the first pic. Am in the midst of doing another shoot. Nothing cast in stone yet. Still having tons of crazy ideas and scouring the net for inspiration. One of my biggest inspiration is Nirrimi Hakanson. Her photos are mindblowing good. I could stare at her photos whole day long and never grow sick of them.  She inspires me to take better photos, and to cast away the conventional idea of beauty and capture what i think is truely beautiful. 

For that, i will continue to shoot, to seek out those moments and immortalise them in images.

Breakfree

I wish i could wake up everyday filled with exitement, dreams to be fufilled, pasion that burns fiercely. Not dread not listlessness not doubts. I wish to have the courage to put a stop to all this. That the crazy ideas that i bounce off randomly may not be that crazy afterall. I really dont know what i am waiting for.

inertia x laos

There was a lot of reluctance to embark on the editing of the Laos photos. I felt that the photos were not good enough and there wasn't any particular photo which made me went "damn that was good". I didn't want to sieve through the photos to realise that omg they are all crap. And I wasn't even done with the Turkey pictures yet. But now with Japan photos coming up; I knew it was time i did something abt it. And surprise surprise i actually liked quite a few photos and some weren't even taken by me. Okay fine those weren't taken by me were pictures of myself and normally i hate having my photo taken because I am extremely anal abt the angles and stuff like that. Not that I proclaim to be a professional. in fact i am bloody far away from that. I dont even see myself as a photographer but just a normal person who enjoys taking photos and dabbling in some basic editing. But if the subject is gg to be me, i feel that i have the right to put my foot down and say no unless it is a touristy shot. and i look like shit in 99% of candid shots. The photos taken this time round was different. I deleted tons of photos and kept some that I would have deleted in the past. The way the photos were taken was slightly different from the past. I was trying to break away from the convention and wanted to take photos that had a slightly raw feel to it. Anyway, so far so good and here are some of my favs.

rollercoaster

tmr i will be flying off to Tokyo for a week. One week of sushi ramen tonkatsu omurice crazy fashion makeup. So much photo opportunities, i miss snapping photos with my Canon. on the depressing side, i think i may never meet the love of my life. settling for the next best thing is just plain depressing.

wtf!

omg i just realised that i messed up the flight timing. Kept thinking i was leaving at night and arriving at Tokyo in the morning. And then i took another look at the flight details. 6am and 6pm. Realised im arriving one day earlier which means no accommodation no bff NOTHING. omg. wtf man. major panicked and whatsapp-ed / msg-ed the bff for help. please please please let her have connection soon. Cannot believe i messed up something like this. WTF IS WRONG WITH ME. ARUGH. now i need plan b and c and d and e and f. Like what if the bff cannot reach one day earlier. Which means i have to look for accommodation somewhere and sleep alone for a night. Which freaks me out because i have never slept in a room all by myself abroad before. Walking around alone is fine but sleeping all by myself if not!!! And what if i get lost and then kidnapped and then raped and killed. My mind is whirling. I want to smack myself. I want to scream. ************************* Major inner freakout session over and now I must calm down and resolve this whole damn thing. xhc you can do it. you can do it. YOU CAN DO IT. big deal one day right? Nah more like half a day. Now pls reply me. OMG.