behind

there is something strangely comforting when I am behind the lens. Lifting the camera to the eye, the click sound when i press the shutter button, the instant when a moment is captured. All my problems melt away when I go into photography mode. I have only one goal in mind which is to capture the moment and everything else cease to be important. My only regret is never taking enough of my loved one. Now with more time on my hands, I want to go out once more to just snap away.

i had my second cervical vaccine jab today. Since I was already at the docs, I decided to seek medical help on my blister which i fondly refer to as a gummy bear. A very deformed looking one. Anyways, two options were given, one to let the body do its magic and heal on its own, or to burst that damn thing. Of course I choose to burst that it. I will give anything for some mini drama in my boringlikehell life now.

I got onto the bed and was all excited to see blood gushing out the moment the needle penetrates the layer of skin. And when the moment came, it was more like a drop. Or maybe two drop, and that was after some squeezing and pushing of the blood out of the blister. I was like "Oh that was kind of anti-climax". I even wanted to tell the doctor to put the excess blood (I was kind of picturing the blood pouring out like Niagara falls) in a vial for me to keep. Which my colleague commented was gross and dirty. I am weird like that okay!?!?

Anyway, the doctor laughed and said I could go back and tell a different story, along the lines of the blood gushing out to hit the ceiling or something. Which I thought was pretty funny. And speaking of funny, yesterday a partner commented that the other unit had such low turnout that if we were to go over to shout something we would probably hear an echo. Which I thought was funny as well. Not funny meh???

After making a formal declaration in whatsapp like a cool parisian-esque/i dont care what other ppl think/i am a free warrior that doesn't conform to social norms/blah blah blah, which I thought finally, a step forward, pat on my back yo!, and then i take two steps back. GAH. I search for one emo song after another on youtube, seeking solace in the music and the lyrics. Warrior my ass. Pftt. Nvm, hair appointment on Sunday. Followed by good food and good conversation. My Sunday shall be the bomb.